Rat Laundry
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Posted to the Ratlist January 29, 2004:
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Subject: Rat laundry question
Would it actually be enough, if I washed them on top degrees? 90º C. Water
boils at 100 º C. I mean, won't the pee get out without help from washing agents at all?
Otherwise, I'm using MiniRisk concentrate.
-L

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Rats can be washed in the home washer and drier.
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Rats can be washed in the home washer and drier. Rats are actually born with laundry care tags, but most
chew their tags off when they're only a few weeks old. I have therefore compiled this set of directions to help you
launder your rats. Rats are delicate and easily damaged by common laundry techniques, so take the following
precautions when cleaning your rodents.

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Wash your rats with laundry of like colors.
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Wash your rats with laundry of like colors. Black and brown rats should be washed with dark laundry, white
and beige rats go in with the whites. If your rat has both dark and white fur, wash him with the darks. Intermediate
colors like blue and mink can go with khaki pants and grey clothing. Never wash a white rat with dark
clothing, or you could end up with a pink pet. Never bleach your rats, or you could end up with a load of
pink-eyed whites.
Always wash your rats in warm water. Cold water may not get them clean enough, and hot water could shrink them
into dwarf rats, which are easily mistaken for mice.

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Set drier to "delicate rodent" setting.
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To dry your rats, set the drier to the "delicate rodent" setting.

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Cricket, fresh from the drier
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Do not overdry your rats or they will come out as a big ball of puffed fluff. It can be difficult to tell a
staticky rat from an angry rat, so you could lose a finger.

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After hours of searching, Snip was found stuck to jeans with static cling
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You may wish to add fabric softener to your load in the drier. Fabric softener helps to control static
cling. There's nothing worse that searching all over the house for a lost rat, only to find it stuck to your back or
leg with static electricity.

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Set your iron to the mammal setting.
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To iron your rats, heat your iron to the mammal setting. Place a towel on the ironing board to absorb any
accidental drops of urine. Hold rat firmly but gently. Always iron your rat in the direction of the fur growth, from
nose to tail. Rex rats must be ironed with particular care, and may need to be ironed by a professional.

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Iron rats in the direction of fur growth, from nose to tail.
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Do not hang rats directly on hangar, its arms will get tired.
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When you are done ironing your rat, hang it in the closet. Do not hang the rat directly on the hangar, its
arms will get tired. Instead, sling a little hammock onto each hangar and place one rat into each hammock.

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Place rat into a hammock slung onto a hangar.
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Washed, dried, and ironed rat hanging happily in the closet.
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"Rat Laundry" was inspired by a series of posts to the Ratlist mailing list in January, 2004. No
rats were harmed (or actually washed, dried, ironed etc.) in the making of this web page. Trick photography was
used for some shots. This page is a joke. Do not launder your own rats.